Florence Kwok

Would you love or hate me more if you knew who I was fully - the person I know I am but do not reveal to any random person?

Or would you at that point wish I did not exist so you would not have to feel stuck in-between and not have to decide?

I keep pondering over in my mind, who I think I am, or what things am I capable of. And in the end, because of the low self-confidence you instilled in me years after years, because of all the hatred you plaster onto me day after day, it makes me wonder.. Maybe I am just what you say I am, another waste of space.

But.

I won’t let you win. I refuse to, cause I know you’re wrong.

That turmoil you caused is seemingly making me relapse, relapse into another…

A route I fight so hard to avoid, but every few years, we seem to meet again. Maybe.. it’s just fate. It was meant to be, for me never to feel joy as long as I am here.

All I did was forget something small that I had to do on Monday, and all the backlash, whiplash, anger and hatred spilled non-stop out from that gap of yours… It’s not like you’ve never forgotten anything before either.

Today started out as a fun and interesting day, could have ended in a rare perfect day in just a few hours but after that “talk”, if you can call it that.., went down the drain from that point on, all because of something super trivial.

So why the hate? Why that menace in your eyes when you look upon me? What have I ever done to you to make you feel like I owed you the world?

I really don’t understand. Then again, I guess, I have never been able to before either. I just take it from you day-in, day-out as if that’s a normality of what encompasses a day.